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The Massacre at Crybaby Bridge: An Oral History - Finale and Aftermath

2020.10.20 06:30 throwawayaracehorse The Massacre at Crybaby Bridge: An Oral History - Finale and Aftermath

The following is the conclusion of my senior capstone for my journalism degree. I sought out to explore the truth behind a local legend in my hometown. My professor rejected the original draft due to its disturbing and unbelievable nature, even though everyone I spoke to claims they're telling the truth. The previous parts are available here:
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7
BOB SCHROEDER, LOCAL HISTORIAN: The Massacre at Crybaby Bridge will live on in the annals of Somerset history and lore. Like all local legends, it’s not immune to thegossip and embellishments that are inevitable in a rural town the size of Somerset.
The state news covered it for about a week and it barely made a blip in the national news headlines. The nation was too caught up with coverage of the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. There was also an effort by many members of the community to suppress the story. They didn’t want the travesty to be the only thing the town was known for.
STEPHEN PARKER: How much fight could I possibly have left? How much adrenaline did I have in reserve? I know that a certain point that death might come as relief. I would no longer have to feel scared for my life.
I wasn’t ready yet.
We rounded the side of the house. There was a barn out back, old and wooden. Completely dark. An old truck was parked next to the barn. Maybe it was open. Maybe it would have the keys in it. Nick headed straight for it. I followed. “ my breath,” he gasped. “Me too,” I agreed.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: The Loveless property was a massacre in its own right. That place alone might be the kind of crime scene that sticks with you for years. Five dead at the scene and in all of those different manners.
STEPHEN PARKER: The doors to the truck were locked. We darted to the inside of the barn. We couldn’t hear anything from behind us, no signs we had been seen or followed. It was really dark in there and as my eyes adjusted I could see a tractor parked dead center of the barn and smell the musty scent of dust and hay.
There was a loft towards the back of the barn that was loaded with bales of hay. A ladder led up to it and in the back of the loft under the angle of the barn’s roof was an open window.
“Let’s hide up there, catch our breath,” Nick said, pointing. Looking back it seems like such a rookie horror movie mistake.
The loft was warm and stuffy and Nick quickly piled up a few bales for us to hide behind. We lied on our bellies like soldiers in a foxhole, peeking through a crack in our alfalfa barricade, waiting for the enemy.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: The first body we encountered was Floyd Loveless. He was deceased on the porch with an extensive penetrating neck injury.
JOEY KESSLER, LOCAL RESIDENT, FARMER**:** They were confused as to what to do with that ol’ gal with the blade in her back. Everyone was afraid to move it. I got creative while they was twiddling their thumbs and waiting on the helicopter. I rushed back with my cutting torch and cut it down close enough to her back.
SKYE BRIGGS: What else could I do but pray? I’d never done it much before, but I sure as hell was right then.
STEPHEN PARKER: The mind of a teenager is not a rational thing. I don’t know what I was thinking. My best friend had just been brutally killed and I had seen it, seen him staggering around in his final throes before he collapsed. All of the others, too.
Maybe stress had done crazy things to my mind. Maybe the adrenaline and survival instinct had made it impossible for me to feel any sort of grief.
It felt like we were up in that loft a long time. I guess it was the silence that made it feel that way. All that I know is that I felt safe in that moment despite all that had happened, the dark all around, the warmth. It felt like there would never be another one.
I could feel Nick’s body rising and falling beside me, his heavy respirations slowing as he caught his breath. I could feel his warmth in the crisp autumn air and smell his sweat and cologne.
In the dark it was like we were anywhere else.
I whispered his name.
“Yeah,” he whispered back, and his face was close to mine as he turned. I took it in my hand and right there in that dusty, hay filled barn, I leaned in to kiss him.
The mind of a teenager is not a rational thing.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: Around the backside of the house we found the second body. A decapitation had occurred.
STEPHEN PARKER: He didn’t turn away right away, didn’t shove me off in a fit of disgust. For a second he let me, I think. I could feel his lips and mouth and then he pulled away.
“Stephen. C’mon man. A bunch of people are dead.”
“Oh. Yeah. You’re right.”
He gave me a pat on the back and then whispered, “I’ve got a plan. If he comes here we can go out the window. It’s a twelve foot drop. We’ll just hang off the side and let go. Bet we could do it pretty quietly.”
Before we could discuss any more there was a scream.
DAVID NEAL, SHERIFF, MOMADAY COUNTY: It was presumed that Mrs. Lorraine Loveless had come out to check on her husband, encountered the perpetrator, and fled to the backside of the house.
STEPHEN PARKER: It was a woman’s voice, screaming “Floyd! Floyd!” and then these kinds of yelps that started sounding closer and then nothing.
DAVID NEAL: Next it was presumed that Shaun Loveless, the son of Mr. and Mrs. Loveless that lived on the property in a fifth wheel camper trailer, attempted to subdue the suspect. His body was found nearby with a twelve-gauge pump action shotgun that was empty of shells. There was blunt trauma to the head with gray matter in the nearby grass accompanied with massive blood loss.
STEPHEN PARKER: After a little while we heard the angry shouts of a man, followed by several gunshots. From our vantage point, this seemed to be coming from a direction away from the house. Nick’s eyes got big. We inched backwards towards the window, but then he stopped, looked at me.
“I’m through running,” he said. His face was serious. “He’s just gonna keep coming and coming and more innocent people are gonna get caught up in it. I’ve got an idea.”
I could only stammer out a “What?”
“Stay here,” he said and gave me a smile. “Go out the window if things get too hairy.”
SKYE BRIGGS: They say the explosion could be heard for miles. I certainly heard it.
STEPHEN PARKER: Nick slithered down the ladder, disappeared in the shadows below me. I waited. So much for my heart rate going back to normal. It beat rapidly in anticipation and I felt close to pissing myself as I feared the worst to come.
STEPHEN PARKER: I still get nightmares where I’m at the end of a long hallway. There’s a door on the other end and it opens. I see that figure, that face, the one that had now appeared in the wide doorway of the barn. It was as close a look at him as I’d been able to get so far. His eyes were dark dead pits in the middle of an expressionless face. I could see now that he wore some type of mask over the top half of his face. His head was sleek and without hair. There were several bleeding holes scattered around his torso, blood oozing from them and not appearing to slow him down in any capacity. In his hands he wielded a T-post. Whether it was the same one he had used before or another I don’t know. It looked wet. Something dripped from its sharp edge.
DAVID NEAL: We arrived on the scene after the explosion. In fact, several of the deputies en route to the area heard it.
STEPHEN PARKER: That motherfucker looked up at me. The tractor roared to life, the diesel engine revving, the gears grinded as the clutch was popped and it lurched forward. It had a front end loader on its front-- basically like this bulldozer kind of thing. It slammed into Big Baby. He didn’t fall underneath it, he withstood the blow, caught it right in his arms and managed to push back on his feet against it. The engine struggled and the throttle roared and Nick sat behind the wheel.
Big Baby managed to skitter back a few feet, but the tractor kept coming for him and soon they both were well out of the barn. Nick maneuvered the levers and tilted the front end loader’s bucket to keep Big Baby on his heels. I slid down the ladder and ducked my head out of the barn’s doorway to watch the outcome.
The last steps took place in a matter of fast forward, before I could truly comprehend what was going on. Big Baby’s arms were bloody and he hung onto the bucket of the front end loader, attempting to pull himself up. His feet hung above the ground. It seemed his goal was climb onto the arms and leap at Nick if he had the chance.
He wasn’t quick enough.
Nick shifted gears and the tractor revved forward to a utility line pole to the left of the house. Sitting next to that pole was the shiny silver of a propane tank, one of those that are shaped like a pill and the size of a house.
I yelled for Nick to look out, yelled for him to jump off, as if gunning straight for that tank hadn’t been his plan all along. As if he didn’t know the stakes.
As if he didn’t know exactly what he was doing.
There was the collision of metal on a body and then the sound of grinding metal as the corner of the bucket pierced the tank. The gas hissed as it escaped and I saw Nick stand up in his seat and fish around in his pocket. He was pretty far away, but I could make out his hand movements as a flame appeared in his hand, the flame from a Zippo lighter.
JOEY KESSLER: I heard that explosion and I thought, “what now?”
IRENE MYRTLE, LOCAL RESIDENT: I thought the good Lord was coming down to get us. The rapture y’know?
TERESA RUSSEL, 911 OPERATOR: The calls started coming in left and right, first the injuries and then about the explosion and all in this particular part of the county. It was mayhem for a while. Busiest night I ever worked.
EDDIE DUNN: LOCAL RESIDENT, UNEMPLOYED: I thought it was them damn terrorists, myself. Heard they might try and strike a little place like the Somerset area on account of all our oil wells and the like. Had even seen some A-rabs at the truck stop recently.
STEPHEN PARKER: If this is a feel-good action movie, if I’m the one writing the screenplay, then Nick turns his back right as he throws the lighter. He does a running leap off the back of the tractor just as the propane tank explodes. The fireball propels him forward, singing the back of his shirt and head and that’s it. He lands in the grass and I run to him and I say, “Looks like you got out just in the Nick of time.” We both laugh and embrace. End scene.
But that’s not what happened no matter how much I look back and try and rewrite it in my mind. What happened was he managed to do a half turn before the tank exploded and the flames engulfed him.
Through the smoldering rubble and debris I found his body and rolled him over and it was clear that there would be no happy ending for us. No final words. Just an embrace followed by me scrambling into the house, finding a phone, dialing 911.
That was it.
SKYE BRIGGS: What we went through only made me stronger. I hate that it happened and I’m not trying to say I’m ultimately glad that it happened or anything like that. I guess what I’m saying is that after you go through something so terrible, it really puts everything into perspective y’know? All your insecurities, all your fears--surviving something like that, they’re nothing in comparison. Besides, I’m only living the life that I think Hailey would want me to. My new confidence or whatever is a testament to her. I mean if you look at what she’s gone through, it’s the least I could do. I think she’s proud of me, but I’m even more proud of her. I could only hope to be fifteen percent of what she is and has always been.
HAILEY ADAMS: That’s something I speak about at my engagements. How even still after all this time and what I’ve remade myself into, there’s still people that speak from the perspective that I’ve had my life ruined or whatever. I don’t look at it that way. Were there times I got down about what I had lost?
Hell yeah. I got pretty low on several occasions. In the end I looked at it as my life was headed in one direction and then this happened and it swerved to this other direction.
The extent of Hailey Adams’s injuries was significant. She was medflighted to the University Hospital, the state’s only Level One trauma center, where she underwent an eight hour surgery. In the end she was left with a spinal cord injury that left her with paraplegia.
Her disability was only the beginning of her journey, however. After rehabilitation and high school graduation she attended college and received her teaching certificate where she became a cheer coach and special education teacher for a number of years. She would later become an advocate for those with disabilities and became quite active on the motivational speech circuit. She has signed a book deal with Simon and Schuster for the publication of her memoir.
She is married and has two children.
STEPHEN PARKER: Back when I would get those emails from Dylan about him and Nick hanging out and I would get this uncomfortable feeling I didn’t quite understand. Later, I would be able to put a name to that feeling: jealousy.
I wished it was me hanging out with Nick instead of him, sweating in that barn and playing guitar, his jawline and the look in his eyes while he played and got lost in the music. I would imagine it would get hot and there and we would have to take off our shirts and then who knows what would happen. It was a fantasy I returned to often and it left me feeling guilty and ashamed. I tried to suppress it.
I didn’t come out for many years after. I grew up going to church and church camps and all that stuff and I guess I suppressed a lot of stuff, y’know? Grew up hearing the word “f-g” and “fxxgot” tossed around. There was lots of denial and confusion. For the longest time, I thought that the death of Nick and everything we’d been through was a punishment for being gay.
SKYE BRIGGS: Steve and I? Yeah, we ended up dating for a while. A long while actually. Going through that event together really made us closer. How could it not? We would go visit Hailey at the hospital together. We would recommend music to each other. My dad, he would teach Steve guitar. He was my date to Junior Prom and we even went to Senior Prom together as friends.
If you had told me before that night all of this, it would’ve seemed like a dream come true. After a while though I realized something was up. I had no qualms or hang ups about sex before marriage and when we got to that point in the relationship I noticed something Like he wasn’t totally into me that way? I mean I tried to convince myself otherwise and he would swear up and down that he was, but there was a drunken night in his den our senior year when we went out to the alley to look up at the night sky and he broke down and confessed.
STEPHEN PARKER: I could trust Skye. It was finally time for me to tell someone, but I asked her to keep it secret. We continued to fake it for a while and eventually broke up. We still keep in touch pretty regularly, although it’s been hard in recent years.
Skye Briggs became the front woman to an alternative rock band. They performed at Vans Warped Tour, SXSW, and ACL Music Festival among others over the years. They had several mild crossover hits including songs featured in various soundtracks for television and movies that you have most likely heard.
She is twice divorced and has a daughter and when not parenting she can be found working on her solo musical career. Her debut solo album is set to release next year.
BOB SCHROEDER, LOCAL HISTORIAN: Why does such a tale captivate us? It is a classic tale with much in common with the slasher genre of films from the horror section of the video rental store. There are teens to be sacrificed, bodies to be collected, scores to be paid, and lessons to be learned. Except in this tale, I’m not sure that there is a moral or lesson to be learned.
STEPHEN PARKER: A moral? A lesson to be learned? Stay home, I guess. Wrap yourself up in bubble wrap and never go outside.
BOB SCHROEDER: Teenagers as a cautionary tale is an old concept. They are the bridges to adulthood, yet we’ve used them over the years for various ends. They are young and dumb and full of come. Or is it piss and vinegar? I can’t remember.
They are nine foot tall and bullet-proof. Or so they think. We use this to our advantage, get them to join our wars and fight for us. They will storm that hill without a second thought and we like them for that. The thirty year old might have second thoughts about it.
We give them 2 ton hunks of steel, death machines capable of reaching speeds of 120 MPH. We give them cell phones to check in with us, knowing full well that they are distracting and likely to increase the chance of a wreck. We cross our fingers and hope for the best.
We send them to school with bullet-proof backpacks and contingency plans for school shooters. We haven’t figured out a better solution.
Our teens are lambs to the slaughter. Always have been. (shrugs shoulders) Eh, but most of them make it out ok.
STEPHEN PARKER: I mentioned earlier that I had found myself back in Somerset years down the road. I mentioned that it brought the emotions roaring back. I found myself in the park and I got out and it was mostly empty, but I was under this row of giant sycamore trees, and I walked around a little until it hit me like a sledgehammer to the gut.
I just broke down and wept. I wept for my past. I wept for Nick and Dylan. I wept for what could’ve been.
BOB SCHROEDER: The other thing about slashers is that they often feature the common trope of the killer getting away. The killer is out there, not quite dead, waiting to return again.
STATE BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION NOTES, OCT 2003: A body from the state medical examiner’s office has been reported missing. The body of the John Doe believed to be responsible for the numerous deaths in Somerset has vanished from the lab site. If you have any information regarding this please contact us at (XXX) XXX-XXXX.
STEPHEN PARKER: I mentioned before about pivotal moments and I’ve thought of another. It’s one that I keep coming back to, a moment outside of all of the trauma. Something warm. Something comforting. In spite of everything that happened, I’m glad that I have this.
Let me set the scene. We’re heading out to Buster’s and we’re all a little giddy. Dylan, he says, “Look at us, just a regular bunch of Breakfast Club motherfuckers up in here.”
HAILEY: Oh really? Why’s that?
DYLAN: It’s an unlikely crew is all I’m saying.
HAILEY: Oh, because I thought you were saying its like all of us fit into a bunch of cliched roles. Are you saying that I’m the cheerleader and Nick’s the jock? What does that make Stephen and Skye?
NICK: I ain’t no jock.
SKYE: Wait, are you saying I’m the weird girl?
STEPHEN: No way in hell you’re the rebel, Nick. You’re the geeky dude.
DYLAN: Look, can we just drop it? How about we’re the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Justice League or something?
Just then, Nick starts to sing the chorus of that song from the movie, “Hey! Hey! Hey! Don’t you...forget about me…” And before you know it it was like a goddamn singalong, the whole truck singing along.
So this was another pivotal moment, for we were all happy and it was like this high we would continue to pursue so that the night didn’t have to end.
Now I’m not a journalist or writer or anything, but if I was writing this thing, that’s where I’d end it.

Stephen Parker drifted for a few years after high school. He eventually pursued a career in medicine. He lives in California.
Image of Bridge 17 Years Later:
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Backstory: I've been struggling off and on with some form of porn since I was 8. I'm 16 now, and it has hurt me in ways I haven't comprehended until recently.
Back in April, this awesome girl from my church and I decided we liked each other (I'm a boy). Things took off, and although we weren't officially dating, we were spending tons of time talking and videocalling and such. We decided to wait a year so we could both grow up more. She made quarantine so much better for me. She was there for me when I was going through hard stuff (My dad has "terminal" stage 4 prostate cancer). She genuinely cares about me so, so deeply. I consider myself lucky. But I really threw a wrench in our relationship when my lust took over.
During quarantine my struggle got to the worst it had ever been, I got on xxx websites for the first time. It had been bad for years, but I had primarily looked at images and non-sexual but inappropriate videos. My lust had gotten out of control, I was masturbating frequently, and maintaining this relationship at the same time. I didn't tell her about my addiction.
Back in February of this year, I had told a girl I liked her, she rejected me, but we still talked. She asked me if I had any prayer requests on the phone one day, and I told her that I'd been struggling with pornography. We prayed and got off of the phone. Later, she said she was feeling overwhelmed by the whole Coronavirus thing (it wasn't that bad then) and wanted to resume our "Bible study" when it was over (I used a Bible study as a way to talk to her, as it was log-distance. It worked, but not as well as I'd hoped.) We haven't talked since. Hence I was timid to bring it up to the girl I love.
I decided to quit porn for good 4 weeks ago yesterday. I was still jerking off, but not frequently, maybe once a week.
Things were going great until last Monday. On Sunday, lust had come up in the conversation a bit, and she asked that I let her know if anything she was doing was causing me to lust. The next day, we got on a videocall before bed, and she wasn't dressed super modestly. If it weren't for my issues, things would have been fine. Her outfit wasn't that immodest, but it was enough for me to think bad things. She definitely wasn't trying to entice me, she just hadn't thought about it. That night while we were on the phone later, I brought it up. The conversation progressed, and I said some stuff I shouldn't have. Here's a few texts she sent me while we were talking over it the next day:
Here are the things that bugged me (or made me uncomfortable) the most that I can think of:
"Is it okay to complement you on that stuff?" (Referencing my chest)
"Wet dreams"
"Do you ever wish we could do it before we get married"
"Maybe that's why I thought you looked so pretty tonight."
"Me and my guy friends talk about this stuff all the time."
Idk if I can think of anything else rn.
I'm stressed rn.
I don't like c o n f r o n t a t i o n
Sorry. ❤

I apologized, but I had REALLY screwed things up between us. Things were hard for the next few days.
She knew I had something going on I wasn't telling her about, as I had told her about the other girl but hadn't explained what I had said that made her cut me off. I told her a while ago myself that there was something happening that I wasn't telling her, but she had her suspicions. We were talking Thursday night, and although I had been advised against it by a trusted adult friend and mentor, I decided I would tell her Friday morning.
2 AM ish Thursday night, my mom knocked on my door. My dad was having AFib, which is a sort of heart arrhythmia, totally out of the blue. I sat next to him and held him up for a good hour as we decided he wasn't getting better and eventually called 911. He got progressively more delirious as the necessary oxygen wasn't getting to his brain. Fast forward to Sunday, as I write this, he was discharged from the hospital today, better.
I texted her that night and postponed our plans to talk in the morning. I was up past 5 AM. That day, her, her mom, and two sisters came over to help clean our house while my family was out. It was nice to see her, we hugged, but things were still strained.
I was tired, I hadn't slept great (shocker), but I wanted to tell her. So that night, we called, and I did. I explained how I'd had this problem for a while, how I'd just recently started doing videos, and how I was clean for a month. We talked for a bit, and she asked me if I masturbated. I said I did.
Here's where I screwed up the second time.
She then opened up about some very private things she'd been dealing with. She was vulnerable, and trusted me with things she had told nobody else. The problem was, my lust-filled mind got turned on my what she said. I didn't jerk off that night after we hung, up, but I did the next morning. That was the most expensive nut I've ever done. That cost me her trust and caused all sort of hurt for her. She opened up and I got kicks off of it. That I wish I had not done. at the very least I shouldn't have told her that it turned me on. My sick, twisted fantasies have put our relationship in a very hard place. I suggested we not talk for a month, and that's what we decided. I'd work on porn, lust, masturbation, etc, and she'd sort out how she felt. I seriously screwed up the first real relationship I've ever had with the most amazing girl I could hope to be in love with. This isn't the end of things, or at least doesn't appear to be, but I learned my lesson and have regrets.
"I'm already too far gone" you say
Go delete your second Reddit account, your PH account (do it by phone or email or something so you don't have to go on the site), or whatever else you need to get rid of. Clear your bookmarks bar. Get software. Talk to someone. You know what needs to be done.
You are reading this post for a reason. Call it Providence.
There's something inside you that makes you know it's wrong.
Learn from my mistakes.
You got this.
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2020.10.17 00:54 jinny526 I got out, here is my long story

I met my ex on a dating site, he seemed to be prince charming, the best thing since sliced bread, I remember thinking to myself I deserve to be with a nice bloke, he ticked all the boxes, he was too perfect in the beginning, he was always complementing me, praising me, it was sickly, I just thought, hes nice I'm not use to dating really nice blokes & pushed forward , normally I would of freaked out coz he was too nice but I didn't I was trying something new a lovey dovey man, he would buy me presents, tell me I was beautiful, said I was the best girl he ever met, wished he met me yrs ago (I'm in my 30s), I finally let him come in my home after 2 month I had just moved in 4 months previously, so still had boxes to unpack, he came in & started bein weird & started crying, saying he couldn't be with me coz I'm messy, so I tried to explain myself, we spent the night together & he automatically thought we were together, which freaked me out but thought ok,
anyway move on 4 months he was rented a flat, I had my own house, I remember a couple of times out of nowhere he would say we couldnt be together, so I started packing my bits up, then he would be like dont go,
Eventually he started moaning about the driving distance, it was a 10 min drive, pushing to move in, I was whoa that's too early to move in together, but he kept goin on & on finally I gave in thinking if it didn't work out least I would know early on, he also smoked weed every day,
(6month) the day he moved in was us packing his stuff up in a van, when we got to mine my family member & his mate were there hadn't seen my family members mate in yrs (f), so was having a 10 min catch up, they just stopped by as my family member had a key & would occasionally stay at mine, they left & that's when he started screaming at me calling me selfish, it was so bad it was like a toddler throwing a tantrum, I remember saying to him to apologise as the way he was acting wasn't rite, he dropped a bunch of screws telling me I needed to pick them up, just screaming at me, the next day he apologised, so I was OK, move on, the names started coming calling me, also said he had OCD, so I had to make sure the house was clean, he started telling me how he hated his exs & what he wanted to do to them, he started talkin about them all the time, I said to him, is this what u will be like if we finished his reply was no he loved me,
anyway I lost my job at this stage due to redundancy, so I made sure the house was clean, cooked dinner, made him coffee whenever he wanted, I didn't like hot drinks so it was never for myself, but it didn't matter what I did it wasn't good enough for him, every morning he would get up go down stairs & start slamming kitchen cupboards for no reason, it started scaring me, at this stage I was still getting paid from work, he made me get up & make him his pack up & flask, I hated it, every morning was the same until I was a robot, did the things he wanted for an easy life, @3pm through the week I would start panicking knowing he would be home in an hour, do a quick house check makin sure everything was to his standard, of course their was always something wrong, he started threatening me calling me lazy, broke my laptop, smashed my cooker, he started goin through my phone & I was asleep & he went through my FB messages, I started having job interviews, 1 time after a row I slept in the spare bedroom & thankfully I was awake I saw him sabotage my alarm clock, if I hadn't of seen him I would of been late, got a job which I don't think he liked, every day we would row (screaming & shouting) it was unbearable, I started saying I didn't want to be with him anymore, he started crying saying he was sorry, I forgave him but of course it still happened over & over again, he wouldn't let me sleep until I gave in, it was hard, I started telling my mate & my family member, they obviously told me to get out, I said I tried he wouldn't leave he told me if I ever called the police he would do me & my family in, I was scared, I told him I was falling out of love with him & didn't want to be with him anymore, he said he didn't care, he threatened if I ever got with anyone he would make sure it ended, he finally agreed to rent a place of his family, after my 2 family members were at my home telling him he needed to leave, he was so sorry crying, he got his stuff slowly all day it took & tried to start on my family member, he left,
he started txtin, sending me stuff, & begged for another chance said it was Coz the house was messy, his OCD, the weed, he said it messed him up, my friend said the house wasn't messy at all & she has OCD it was fine it's him, he persuaded me to b mates, I went along, at this time I was a broken person, he started ringing & asked to come round then it started to be every day, then obviously we got bk together, he would make me make him coffee cook him dinner, 1 time I remember I didn't want to go to his, he made me, I was crying, he locked me in his home, wouldnt let me out, couple of days later, I changed the locks told him it was over & he could come pick his couple of bit up in a couple of days, he came round, kicked the door through, I try to call the police he smashed my phone up, had me on the landing hanging from my hair I was dangling, I was terrified & scared, he threatened my family & friends, he ended up moving bk in saying he was bein kicked out, I found out it was a lie,
I started goin on Google coz I didn't know what I was in, I finally had enough I told him it was over & I mean it, he was bk to crying, I kept it up said no I didn't love him, the only reason I stayed was because I was scared, he said it was because of the weed, he made every excuse he could, I said I don't care I'm not folding, he started bein very nice, I still said no, normally I would of folded, but I didn't, then he started being nasty threatening me, my house, my family & friends, I told him no one liked him, every morning goin to work he would cause an argument, tell me what he did to his ex, we would argue at least 5 times a day, when walking to work I would put the phone down, he told me he would come to my work or get his family to come, I had to speak to my boss, that day I received flowers from him, I gave them to a girl at work, I was a wreck, I found womens aid, I went once a week to their meetings, they helped me, they asked if I wanted to look into clairs law, which is a loop hole to see if this kind of thing has happened before in his previous relationships, I said no I felt like it was betrayal
he would be so nice & if I didn't fold he would get angry, I realised it was all an act & game play, I told him he can sleep in the spare room, he would the 20 min later he would get in my bed, so I ended up in the spare room, he asked me if I liked the flowers I said I threw them in the bid, he got nasty told me I will have to pay for them, I told him I didn't want or ask for them, threatened to smash my stuff up, his f member came by, I told her everything, she told me it was normal to threaten people in a relationship she said this in front of my f member, when she left she said it isn't & couldn't believe she said that, his f member called me asking if it was over & was I sure, I said yes, she rang me bk saying his willin to go to therapy, I said I didn't care its over, my f member took me to the police station, I got a call the next day from the police from the domestic side, I went in I told them I want to do a statement not for him to get arrested but a statement for future reference, just in case, they took it, they rang me on my lunch & told me to txt him that he needs to b gone from my home by the time I get bk, by this time he had his own business so he had free time, he told me it was impossible, I just kept repeating it, I went home & he was gone, he had left some bits, i changed the locks, got some cameras up, got my friend to stay over with me
he started texting me calling me, got his f member calling me, I didn't answer or reply, they even withheld their number, my f member moved his stuff to the front garden, i txt him to come & collect, I then changed my number,
I needed proper therapy but couldn't afford it, I started to look for help on utube videos a women called angie Atkinson helped with her videos, I finally understood what was happening, their was so many videos to help & to understand narcissistic & controlling behaviour, I started to accept who he was, the beginning of the relationship was called love bombing that person Prince charming never existed it was a lie, the excuses was just that an excuse for him to treat me bad, I did things not because I wanted to but because I was scared I wanted the shouting to stop the threats to stop, I put my happiness last, he used to say I was the best thing then in stead of saying them thing it was always a put down, I started saying what do u like about me, he was a conman a liar, the relationship was a lie, everything about him was a lie, he never did these things in front of anyone else, always behind closed doors, if he truly didn't know what he was doin he would do these things in public, he never did, my f member heard some of the conversations we had coz he was screaming that loud, he didn't think anyone was around, I also started to voice record him, womens aid once again asked me if I wanted to do the clairs law (Google it claire law ) this time I said yes, I found out so much, he had done this before, I felt relieved it wasn't in my head as he would say I'm bi polar, I'm crazy, our relationship was normal
U feel ashamed, embarrassed that u let someone do this to u, it's not ur fault, u survived & u went into survival mode, if ur on here or if u Google it, u no theirs something not right, trust ur gut thats what's it for, it's ur human instinct to keep u out of danger, u have a funny feeling trust it, lookin bk now their was so many red flags I bypassed, u feel stupid, people say if it was me I would of just left, they say that, I would of said that, but they have a hold on u, u always think of the beginning & how great it was & all u want is for it to be how it was in the beginning this is where u were groomed in the beginning, that's why I say its a lie & it is, the way he treats u after is the real him the monster is the real him, he knows what he is doin, coz if he didn't why wasn't he like this on the 1st date, coz he knows u would of ran a mile, he knows he needs to lie, love Bomb u, so u stay hooked & it works, I finally accepted this was him
In my house alone I was scared but I was free, for months I wouldn't open the curtains, I still felt like I had to walk on egg shells, it was so weird I had to learn to be me again & learn what I liked to do, he didn't like anything about me, he made me change who I was, that fun loving person who was care free was no longer, I was an empty shell I didn't know who I was, u have to find urself again, the police helped with getting all my locks changed, they had my number & house address red flagged incase he came round, he was emailing me, he even called my family members, because I knew the real him, their was no way I was goin bk, it was a light bulb moment, I finally saw him for who he was
I met someone months later & we realised my ex was following us, I called the police they took a statement, I didn't want him arrested as I was still scared of him, & scared what him & his family would do to me, another time he bumped into my bf & threatened me saying he will kick in my door again & smash my house up & get me attacked, again I called the police, it's hard to start again but it is the best thing ever to be free, 2yrs of hell I went through, guess what all the things he threatened he never did, it was all a scare tactic to keep me in line, he was so negative on everything and everyone, all he had was a fake shallow persona, he might not of acted on his threats but the threat were real, lookin back now his pathetic, he has to scare women to be with him I no I wasn't the first & I no I won't b the last, he has to put women down & control them to make himself feel better about himself, the reason for my post is to help u, its hard to get out & stay with it, u just have to keep goin do not fold keep fighting for ur freedom , if u have to leave with nothing do it, if u have to go to a shelter do it, it's worth it to be free, things can be replaced, u can't be replaced, u need to get out for u, my ex knows where I live, if u go to a shelter or find a new place u have the chance to start afresh without him knowing where u are, u can learn to protect urself & property, get cameras, store ur important things at a friends or familys home little by little or lie, save money if u can , stay with f members or mates, then if u can't go anywhere else go to a shelter, what is more important is ur freedom & happiness, I look bk now & feel stupid that I let him do this to me, it's sad that he needed to do this to a woman all coz he was scared of bein alone, he has to threatened women to be with him coz reality is he has nothing to offer in a relationship, his borin, can't laugh at himself, is to uptight, has to b in control, u have to do what he says, he gets off on u bein miserable, he loves it, remember the way he treats u isn't love its control, the saying if u love them set them free, would u want someone to b with u because they want to or because u force them, that's not love its control
it's been 3yrs I bumped into him the other week, he called my name, I ignored him & walked straight passed him, my heart was pounding, every day gets better & u deserve so much more than bein treated this way, it doesn't matter who they are with, if both parties are smiling in a photo, he will do the same to the next girl & that is my closure its not me it's him, I hope my story helps u see him for who he really is & helps u seek help & get out, it doesn't matter how u met, who u are how old u are, this can happen to anyone, get out & be free xxx
submitted by jinny526 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]

2020.10.14 16:49 Emzy11396 New to this and could use some advice please!

Full disclosure: I live in the UK, have 3 kids, a partner and some mental health problems.
And here we go. Okay, a couple years ago me and my partner talked and about a year ago decided to open up our relationship, I spoke with a guy for a bit but it didn't work out.
My partner and I set some ground rules but we haven't been actively seeking people out, but I don't really know much about how to proceed, whether I/we should be out to people (family, friends etc.), I think I'd like to try out some dating apps/sites but don't know where to start. Any advice for someone new to the community, any and all advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance, take care out there lovelies. Xxx
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submitted by IdolA13Octl to u/IdolA13Octl [link] [comments]

2020.10.13 17:04 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
I'm available for:
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
submitted by bhoway to freelance_forhire [link] [comments]

2020.10.13 17:04 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

[For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥
Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
  • I graduated (with Honours) from the 4-year Bachelor of Interaction Design program at Sheridan College (Canada), where I honed skills in user-centered and accessible design practices.
  • I have over 7+ years of experience designing and developing sites and UX/UI for small business owners and startups. Websites, web applications, and mobile apps. From SaaS startups to B2C applications to small business websites - I've been blessed to have worked with many wonderful entrepreneurs and clients over the past years.
  • Previous in-house working experience at Drop ($65M+ raised to date) and Christie Digital.
  • My focus is on crafting beautiful designs that are clean with a focus on usability and conversion. I'm very detail-oriented with a focus on typography, spacing, and the positioning of elements.
I'm available for:
  • Design Sprints & Prototyping - I can help turn that idea in your head into a fully-designed product using my design sprint process.
  • UX/UI Redesign & Modern Refresh - Your current UX is poor and needs a complete or partial revamp. I can pinpoint issues and give it a modern design facelift.
  • UX/UI & Product Design Partner - I work as a partner of your team (through Slack or Skype) to design and guide the direction of your digital product.
  • General UX/UI & Web Design - Using Figma, Sketch, or Adobe XD.
  • Front-End Development - Using HTML/CSS/JS, I can turn designs into functional templates.
  • WordPress Development - Custom WordPress design & development.
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
  • I'd be happy to hear about your project. Let's talk! Please contact me through my website. :)
submitted by bhoway to DesignJobs [link] [comments]

2020.10.13 17:04 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
I'm available for:
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
submitted by bhoway to jobbit [link] [comments]

2020.10.13 17:04 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

[For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥
Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
  • I graduated (with Honours) from the 4-year Bachelor of Interaction Design program at Sheridan College (Canada), where I honed skills in user-centered and accessible design practices.
  • I have over 7+ years of experience designing and developing sites and UX/UI for small business owners and startups. Websites, web applications, and mobile apps. From SaaS startups to B2C applications to small business websites - I've been blessed to have worked with many wonderful entrepreneurs and clients over the past years.
  • Previous in-house working experience at Drop ($65M+ raised to date) and Christie Digital.
  • My focus is on crafting beautiful designs that are clean with a focus on usability and conversion. I'm very detail-oriented with a focus on typography, spacing, and the positioning of elements.
I'm available for:
  • Design Sprints & Prototyping - I can help turn that idea in your head into a fully-designed product using my design sprint process.
  • UX/UI Redesign & Modern Refresh - Your current UX is poor and needs a complete or partial revamp. I can pinpoint issues and give it a modern design facelift.
  • UX/UI & Product Design Partner - I work as a partner of your team (through Slack or Skype) to design and guide the direction of your digital product.
  • General UX/UI & Web Design - Using Figma, Sketch, or Adobe XD.
  • Front-End Development - Using HTML/CSS/JS, I can turn designs into functional templates.
  • WordPress Development - Custom WordPress design & development.
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
  • I'd be happy to hear about your project. Let's talk! Please contact me through my website. :)
submitted by bhoway to forhire [link] [comments]

2020.10.12 20:48 -newme Python AttributeError with external API, even tough the object exists

I asked this on stackoverflow already, but didn't get any responses, maybe you can help.
I am currently trying to build my first flask website.
I use this API to get movie data for the site:
When I call the API to get for example movie details:
from tmdbv3api import TMDb, Movie tmdb = TMDb() tmdb.api_key = XXX # Define objects movie = Movie() def getmovie(movieid): film = movie.details(movieid) return film 
It works perfectly I pass for example a list of movie objects to jinja and then loop through and access the details, e.g.
... {% for movie in movies %} 
{{ movie.title }}
{{ movie.title }}
{% else %} {% endfor %}
This works pretty well.
But i also want to store data from the movie objects in a database, so that I don't have to access the API all the time:
(This tries to store a movie in the db (SQLite3) everytime it gets added by a user):
# Query db for watchlist, call API, then returns list of movie objects def save_movie(movie_id): m = movie.details(movie_id) # check if already there if db.execute("SELECT * FROM movies WHERE movie_id = :movie_id", movie_id=movie_id): return False genre_1 = m.genres[0]["name"] genre_2 = m.genres[1]["name"] db.execute("INSERT INTO movies (movie_id, title, year, releasedate, running_time, imdb_id, status, overview, country, poster_path, genre_1, genre_2) VALUES (:movie_id, :title, :year, :releasedate, :running_time, :imdb_id, :status, :overview, :country, :poster_path, :genre_1, :genre_2)", movie_id=movie_id, title=m.title, year=m.release_date, releasedate=m.release_date, running_time=m.runtime, imdb_id=m.imdb_id, status=m.status, overview=m.overview, country=m.productioncountries, poster_path=m.poster_path, genre_1=genre_1, genre_2=genre_2) return True 
The problem is, no matter which attribute of the movie object I try to access it gives me the following error, e.g. if I try to get m.overview:
AttributeError: 'AsObj' object has no attribute 'overview' 
I tried googleing but didn't find an answer. I just don't get why jinja has no problem accessing the attributes of the movie objects. But python has.
I guess it has todo with the "creating of the attributes" at a later time. Debug shows me that after the function is called, the object is created and has the "missing" attributes.
Thank you in advance!
submitted by -newme to learnpython [link] [comments]

2020.10.11 20:10 NuSuntTroll Mi-a fost suspendat talonul si am luat amenda pe motiv de "folie sau tratamente chimice" pe stopuri fumurii nemodificate

TL;DR: mi s-a retinut talonul pentru ca aveam stopuri fumurii omologate in germania cu care am trecut si RAR-ul pentru ca politistul nu m-a crezut ( ca nu sunt trecute in CIV ) si a spus ca am aplicate folii sau tratamente chimice de culoare fumurie pe ele. Intrebarile mele sunt la finalul postarii.
Update 1: Cei de la JOM mi-au trimis toate testele de la TUV cu stampile si toate aprobarile, nu dau seama celor cu comentarii cu privire la legalitatea lor sau legate de culoare, cred ca reiese ca problema nu e legalitatea ci ce pot sa fac pentru a preveni situatia descrisa pe viitor si de a anula amenda.
Versiunea completa: Ieri in zona Dristor (Sector 3) Bucuresti ma deplasam pe Bulevardul Camil Ressu dispre McDonalds in directia ParkLake (eram cu sotia in masina). Eram oprit la culoarea rosie a semaforului din intersectia mare din Dristor (intersectia cu Strada Ramnicu Valcea) pe banda 2. S-a facut verde la semafor, dau sa plec, vad ca in stanga mea este o masina de politie de la rutiera si fac 5 metri de abia plecat de la semafor, porneste girofarul, se baga langa mine pe banda 1, incetinesc si imi face semn sa opresc. Trag pe partea dreapta, pun avariile si astept sa vina agentul. Foarte nedumerit ca am zis ca poate am gresit cu ceva la semafor ca masina nu era oprita pentru controale ci se afla in trafic ca si mine. Vine agentul la mine, imi cere documentele, le prezint si foarte nedumerit il intreb daca am gresit cu ceva. Atunci politistul suprins sau iritat de intrebarea mea mi-a spus ca m-a oprit pentru ca am folii pe stopuri. Atunci eu si mai surprins i-am raspuns ca nu este posibil asa ceva, stopurile sunt fumurii din fabrica si ca asa a fost inmatriculata masina cu aceleasi stopuri acum 7 ani la RAR in Bacau (masina fiind adusa din Germania cu toate modificarile si customizarile in service-uri autorizate din Germania cu produse omologate la ei de proprietarul neamt ce a detinut-o). Pe certificatul vechi german erau 3 randuri de customizari trecute pentru ca masina are schimbate faruri, stopuri, navigator, bordul pentru navigator, adaugat pachet extra de la Volkswagen cu incalzire in scaune, sistem audio (nu va ganditi la subwoofere, sistem audio normal de bun gust) si altele de care nici eu nu stiu la cate are.
Revenind, politistul se duce in spate la stopuri, vine si colega lui pe care habar nu am cum o cheama ca nu s-a prezentat dar isi dadea si ea cu parerea, se uita la stopuri, vad ca tot se uita nedumeriti, strig pe geam sa deschida portagajul (pentru ca nu am voie sa cobor de capul meu din masina) sa se uite si pe interior la stopuri sa caute folia aia de care zice dansul. Revine la mine si imi cere sa cobor si ma cheama in spate si imi zice ca clar am folie pe ele, atunci tot nedumerit (eu nu el), deschid portbagajul si sterg praful de pe interiorul stopului sa ii arat (nu ca as sti cum arata o folie sau ceva ca n-am avut personal legatura cu astfel de customizari) ca asa sunt stopurile. Atunci zice ca am sigur am facut tratamente chimice (reactia mea a fost "ce naiba zice asta, e chimist?") ca "sigur nu sunt in regula" sau "sigur nu sunt legale" ceva de genul, el era sigur pe intuitia lui. Colega lui de asemena "da, are ceva" asa din presupuneri. I-am explicat ca asa cum vede masina asa a fost adusa si inmatriculata din Germania la RAR in Bacau pentru ca acolo m-am nascut si am locuit (am adresa de Bucuresti pentru ca aici lucrez) de vreo 6 ani si m-am stabilit aici. Raspunsul dansului a fost "da, va cred, poate asa se practica acolo in Bacau" (aici iar eram ce vrea sa zica asta, ca am dat mita, ca el stie mai bine ca RAR-ul), atunci m-am enervat putin pentru ca a repetat de mai multe ori ca "la Bacau" sau expresii de genul care cel putin mie mi s-au parut comentarii care nu isi au sensul si putin discrimanatorii si sa nu mai zic ca intr-un fel acuzau RAR-ul de acolo ca nu stiu ce fac sau cine stie la ce facea aluzie. Atunci, cel putin parerea mea mi s-a parut ca toata situatia s-a invartit pentru ca aveam stopuri fumurii si pentru ca eram cu numere de Bacau.
Revenind din nou, imi zice ca sigur am folosit ceva substante chimice fumurii (ma gandesc ca spray ca n-am laborator chimic acasa, ideea cu spray-ul mi-a venit cand am ajuns acasa ca am citit ca sunt persoane care chiar isi dau cu spray stopurile sa para mai inchise, aici eram iar nedumerit ca cineva face asa ceva dar irelevant caci nu era situatia mea). I-am zis de mai multe ori ca in atatia ani si toate ITP-urile facute si RAR-ul si cei de la ITP nu au zis nimic de aceste stopuri si el a zis ca n-au treaba cei de la ITP (desi din ce stiu nu cred ca poti trece ITP cu magarii din astea). Mi-a cerut sa ii dovedesc omologarea farurilor, aici m-am blocat, cum puteam sa dovedesc ca am faruri legale, asta chiar nu stiam cum sa o fac, i-am spus ca am actul de vanzare la stopuri si cutia originala (noroc ca mi-a dat neamtul care a vandut masina stopurile originale in cutia de la stopurile astea fumurii si actele pe care le avea el cu revizii facute si aparent si actul de vanzare al stopurilor) dar sunt in Bacau ca doar nu le car dupa mine neavand probleme de genul pana acum si sa justific ceva care este vandut si cu conforme europene (conform site-urilor care vand produsul "E-Mark", si conform facturii de vanzare care pare sa aiba un logo "TUV" printat), eu trebuind sa demonstrez ca ceva ce a trecut RAR-ul si este vandut in UE si customizat in Germania (din ce am inteles de la vanzator ar fi tot la reprezentanta in Germania customizat, dar cum am doar factura de cumparare si niste verificari la masina in Germana nu stiu cum as putea demonstra, nu ca mi s-ar parea normal sa demonstrez asa ceva). I-am cerut sa cheme pe cineva de la RAR, adica mi-a picat cerul in cap cand am auzit ca trebuie sa demonstrez ca sunt omologate stopurile sau ca nu au subtante chimice sau ca e ceva in neregula cu el ca nici nu mai stiam ce insinua ca tot ce am inteles e ca "sigur au ceva pe ele". Acum ca sa nu mai spun ca de la folii fumurii si de la substante chimice mi se cere sa demonstrez ca faruruile sunt omologate, nici nu mai stiam ce vrea de la mine.
Vazand ca nu am cum sa demonstrez ca farurile sunt omologate mi-a cerut sa intru inapoi in masina. Intru, dansul se deplaseaza inapoi la masina de politie sta cateva minute si revine catre mine si imi spune ca a verificat la RAR (nu stiu cum a facut el asta dar nu-i problema mea asta) si nu exista nici o inregistrare ca farurile sunt omologate sau inregistrate (nu stiu ce inseamna "inregistrate"). Revin iar la partea cu RAR-ul facut in Bacau, cum am spus 3 randuri de customizari pe talonul din Germania si nimic precizat pe talonul de Romania, i-am intrebat pe cei de la RAR daca nu trebuiesc trecute customizarile de pe talonul din Germania si mi-a spus ca nu trebuiesc deoarece toate sunt conform normelor europene si din punct de vedere legal tot ce este aprobat in Uniunea Europeana nu trebuie omologat. Eu am zis ok si mi-am vazut de treaba, doar nu-s eu mai destept ca cei de la RAR.
Revenind la agentul de politie, cum verificarile lui la RAR nu arata nici o dovada de omologare a stopurilor deci e ceva in neregula cu ele asa ca imi retine talonul. Satul de aceasta disputa fara sens i-am spus sa faca cum crede si voi face si eu ce cred ca trebuie facut (adica sa contest decizia sau ce se face cum nu mi se pare corect sa imi iau amenda pe pareri). Vazand ca tot o tin pe a mea s-a dus la masina sa imi scrie procesul verbal. A mai iesit o data si din ce am vazut eu parea sa faca poze la stopuri desi parea ca poza din centrul masinii din spate cu camera in jos nu in plan perpendicular pe stop, ma gandesc ca poate vrea arate ca nu se vad becurile, desi clar nu se vad becurile ca masina e automata si era pusa in parking si nici nu era piciorul pe frana ca sa fie aprinse stopurile. Imi ceruse la un moment dat sa bag si in marsalier sa se uite daca se vad dar n-am vazut sa faca vreo poza sau sa verifice cu vreun aparat. Intre timp mi-am amintit ca aveam un link pe telefon catre majoritatea customizarilor pentru ca le-am asigurat separat pentru CASCO si am gasit linkul dar din pacate nu mai era valabil articolul deci ce sa mai arat... A revenit la masina si mi-a dat sa semnez procesul verbal si daca am mentiuni, si am spus sa treaca ca "Nu sunt de acord cu cele precizate, masina a fost inmatriculata cu stopurile existente". A scris mentiunea, m-a pus sa dau doua semnaturi si mi-a inmanat procesul verbal. L-am intrebat cum trebuie sa procedez sa contest procesul si mi-a spus ("va repet din nou", de parca eu stresat am retinut toate informatiile date de el cu ce sectie si unde sa ma duc la RAR si care e adresa la care trebuie sa ridic talonul) ca daca "sunteti sigur" ca nu ati facut nimic la faruri (adica clar sunt sigur adica despre ce vorbim...) sa nu platesc amenda si sa ma duc la RAR sa imi dea o stampila pe dovada aia si sa ma intorc la sectie sa imi dea "el" talonul. A specificat ca trebuie sa ma duc la RAR Grivitei, mi s-a parut foarte ciudat ca a cerut specific la acel RAR, sotia a intrebat daca se poate la RAR in Bacau si a zis ca nu se poate si ca oricum tot aici ajung verificarile astea. Mie cel putin mi s-a parut foarte ciudat ca a specificat exact acel RAR, existand si un RAR in Voluntari si zicand ca nu se poate decat la acel specific RAR. Am plecat si am vazut ca in fata masinii de politie, care intre timp s-a mutat mai in fata si nu o vazusem ca era dupa doua masini parcate si avea girofarul pornit, era o masina cu numere de italia pe avarii pe care presupun ca a tras-o colega dansului pe dreapta ca intre timp disparuse dansa, ea statea la masina venise doar sa isi dea cu parerea. Am presupus ca dansul oprea numai masini cu numere care nu erau de Bucuresti, iar ma ducea la discriminare sau poate vroia ciubuc sau cine stie ce vroia.
Mentiunea agentului pe procesul verbal este: "A condus auto nr XX XX XXX pe Camil Ressu/ Ramnicu Valcea, avand montate pe triplele spate folii sau tratamente chimice de culoare inchisa prelegand (nu inteleg cuvantul scris) si diminueaza eficacitatea luminilor de semnalizare, stop pe pe frana si marsalier". Nici macar nu m-a pus sa semnalizez cand s-a uitat in spate ci doar sa bag in marsarier, lucru care automat a facut vizibile si stopurile dar nu cred ca a pozat lucrurile astea ca nu m-am uitat, am vazut ca a pozat doar cand nu erau aprinse stopurile, sa vad si eu in instanta diminuarea de care zice dansul. Singurele substante chimice erau doar un strat subtire de praf ca nu mai spalasem masina de ceva vreme dar nu va ganditi la moloz.
Am pus si un video facut a doua zi dupa incident cu masina exact cu acelasi praf si in aceeasi stare in care era si atunci (mai multe poze si video-uri cu stopuri din aceeasi gama la finalul postarii, si cu factura pe care o detin):
Acum am mai multe nelamuriri:
  1. Pot sa ma duc la orice RAR? Sincer mi-e frica sa ma duc acolo ca mi-e ca o fi vreo schema cu cei de la RAR desi nu vad cum pot comenta cei de la RAR daca totul este ok cu stopurile dar in Romania orice este posibil, am auzit destule ca eu nu am nimic impotriva sa ma duc acolo decat frica asta ca sunt tras la raspundere pe lucruri legale ca mai presus ca RAR-ul nu stiu daca este
  2. Considerati ca este abuz ce a facut dansul? Eu nu am vazut nimic clar cum ca as avea substante chimice pe stop, nici nu stiu cum se poate testa asa ceva dar daca ma acuzi de ceva demonstreaza-mi ca asa este pentru ca eu pentru banii aia primiti amenda (1300 RON) muncesc destul si nu am auzit vreodata ca meseria sa functioneze pe presupuneri sau sa dai amenzi pe presupuneri
  3. Daca credeti ca este abuz se merita sa fac o plangere civila impotriva dansului pentru acuzatii fara dovezi clare? Adica nici n-as lasa situatia asa ca daca ma opresc 50 asa ca li se pare lor unde ajungem?
  4. Dupa ce am citit mai mult despre contestari amenzi rutiere am aflat ca amenda nu se anuleaza daca RAR-ul zice ca este ok verificarea pentru talon ci trebuie sa contest in instanta neaparat ca sa se anuleze, de aici si intrebarea cum e mai bine sa procedez: sa platesc amenda inainte ca este jumatate din suma si daca castig sa mi se restituie suma sau sa cer amanarea amenzii si daca pierd (doar daca is mana in mana RAR cu dansul vad asta posibil) sa platesc tot?
  5. Pentru dosarul de instanta ce as putea sa aduc sa ma ajute momentan nu am decat actul de vanzare al stopurilor in germana pe care are un logo "TUV", nu stiu daca am un certificat in cutie ca am cerut unei rude sa imi trimita cutia de la Bacau cu tot cu stopurile vechi, poate am si vreun certificat, dar nu cred. Am cerut celor care au vandut stopurile sa imi dea un certificat de orice fel sau toate certificatele pe care le-ar putea avea pentru modelul respectiv de stop care sa ateste ca e acreditat. Am vazut ca nu mai au modelul meu pe site-ul lor dar pare ca au modelul cu sticla clara. Acum astept sa imi raspunda, am sa incerc sa ii si contactez ori prin telefon ori cumva prin email sau prin orice mijloc posibil, problema este ca nu vorbesc germana dar gasesc eu pe cineva sa le formuleze un Email, dar asta nu garanteaza ca imi vor trimite ceva, am incercat sa caut o baza de date unde se poate verifica ca e conform dar n-am gasit nimic. Desi produse similare cu ce am eu se vand pe multe site-uri din Romania. Ma gandeam sa cer de la RAR, nu stiu daca trebuie din Bacau, pozele cu masina de la inmatriculare pentru ca sunt sigur ca i-am vazut cum pozau masina din toate unghiurile si se va vedea clar ca erau aceleasi stopuri si sa le compare in instanta cu cele ale politistului. Stiu ca se poate cere o cautare in arhiva la RAR contra cost, nu stiu si daca ma lasa sa fac o copie sau sa imi dea pozele respective si daca pot face asta din Bucuresti. Am cautat istoricul masinii de la RAR pe site-ul lor dar nu contine pozele facute la RAR sau precizari legate de stopuri.
  6. Credeti ca pot cere vreo dovada de la RAR in care sa zica explicit ca stopurile sunt in regula ca sa pot prezenta in instanta sau sa o am asupra mea in cazul in care ma mai opreste un agent care are pareri? Nu de alta dar si daca castig procesul, nu am cum sa fiu sigur ca nu se mai repeta, am citit pe forumuri si despre persoane cu folii omoloagate si cu toate actele care isi iau amenzi degeaba si le anuleaza dar as prefera sa evit pe cat posibil situatii similare ca nu am timp de pierdut. Si solutii romanesti de genul schimba-ti stopurile nu sunt solutii realistice pentru ca imi plac stopurile actuale si ce fac de acum schimb toate customizarile facute de ala din germania doar ca sa nu imi iau amenzi de la persoane care isi dau cu parerea?
  7. Este posibil sa ma trezesc in instanta sa zica politistul ca as fi avut ceva si ca l-as fi dat jos? Dansii aveau camere de filmat pe piept si ma gandesc ca pot cere sa se prezinte dovezile dar sa nu existe cazuri in care "se pierde" filmarea, sau nu stiu ca as vrea politistul sa dovedeasca "substantele chimice" de care vorbeste nu eu sa vin sa demonstrez ca nu am substante chimice. Duc masina la judecatorie sa faca ce teste vor ei sau la RAR ca oricum trebuie sa ma duc pentru talon dar la cate se intampla in Romania tare mi-e ca la un moment dat am sa ma trezesc cu vreo surpriza care sa nu imi dea caz favorabil.
  8. Este posibil ca politistul sa fi facut acest lucru pentru ca isi primeste procentaj din amenta ca rasplata (eu asa am auzit ca primesc si ei un procent) sau sa isi faca norma? Daca isi primeste procentaj din amenda si amenda se anuleaza ce se intampla? Si este sanctionat politistul pentru o situatie de genul daca castig procesul?
  9. Ultima intrebare si poate cea mai importanta, sa caut un avocat care sa ma ajute cu procesul sau se da un avocat din oficiu ca as vrea sa evit vreo situatie de caz nefavorabil ca am scris eu ceva gresit sau cine stie ce chestie ce poate fi exploata ca om juridic nu-s si nici nu vreau sa platesc amenda care mi-a fost data pe nedrept. Atata timp cat nu s-a folosit un aparat sa masoare nu stiu eu ce, cat nu s-a dezlipit nimic, cat nu a dat cu ceva sa imi arate ca are el dreptate ca am eu "substante chimice" sau folie sau ce oi fi avand eu il consider abuz si mi se pare foarte aiurea sa demonstrez ca nu am "substante chimice", adica nu stiu cum pot demonstra chestia asta, sa ma duc la laboratoare chimice sa faca teste pe stopuri, pff la ce s-a ajuns.
Modelul de stopuri:
- JOM 82907 pentru Golf 6 (gama URBAN Style)
Alte produse de pe site-ul producatorului similare:
Cum se vad in poze asa se vad si in realitate, sunt foarte negre dar se observa ledurile din interior foarte clar cand nu sunt aprinse iar semnalizarea, stopul si marsarierul sunt foarte clare si cand sunt aprinse exact ca in pozele respective. Am cautat semnul "E1" cel de E-mark in poza dar cred ca este sub inscrisul acoperit de cablu din poza, nu am dat jos stopul
Producatorul e, acesta e site-ul lor si multe din modelele similare cu aceeasi nuanta de de fumuriu se pot gasi si in Romania:
Dar am gasit modelul pe jom-usa, pare ca au si site de SUA:
Site-uri romanesti cu produse similare de la acelasi producator:
Am gasit si cateva video-uri cu stopuri similare (din pacate nu modelul de golf 6) la culoare si intensitate a negrului ca sa va faceti o parere, dupa cum se observa nu exista nici o problema de iluminare:
Stopurile sunt cumparate direct de la JOM, atasata cu factura asta care are logo-ul "TUV CERT" in partea dreapta, stiu ca probabil asta nu arata certificarea dar clar sunt certificate si ok daca se vand si in Romania si RAR-ul nu a spus nimic si nici ITP-ul.
Scuze pentru postarea lunga dar incerc sa ofer cat mai multe detalii cu privire la situatie. Pentru ca n-am facut contestatii in trecut si nici nu am gasit o situatie similara descrisa pe undeva pentru probleme cu "substante chimice" sau ce zice el.
submitted by NuSuntTroll to Romania [link] [comments]

2020.10.11 17:42 Pretty_Times Received a too good to be true message, but can't find the catch. Help?

hi all, can you help me find out what kind of scam this is? This is certainly a strange, too good to be true message, but I can't figure it out.
"I read your profile and thought I would send you a note. As my profile states I am looking for a clothed platonic cuddle arrangement only. I am not really interested in dating, dining out or travel. I stay at the Hilton garden inn when I am in town so am able to host if that is your preference. I understand premise of this site. So on our first meet I would pay you cash up front and either of us could end the visit any time for any reason with no questions asked. I would expect the visits to last two or three hours. (I am not interested in overnights). I think the allowance range for the type of session I would like would be xxx-xxx per visit or a monthly allowance of xxxx" (ps. Prices are average for this area)
UPDATE: we talked more and he said he wants the closeness without the drama, stress and expectations of physical intimacy and relationships. He said he was doing professional cuddling before but couldn't find a consistent cuddler so came to SA. I think he's a legit person (although part of me is always thinking I will be kidnapped haha)
submitted by Pretty_Times to sugarlifestyleforum [link] [comments]

2020.10.05 18:48 Meda5Oct What you are looking for is..... (Link in the Desc.)3

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submitted by Meda5Oct to u/Meda5Oct [link] [comments]

2020.10.02 20:04 CJT2013 My 1 Year Anniversary of Full Time Day Trading. 3 Years In The Business. What I Wish I Could Tell Myself Years Ago.

This industry has a lack of transparency so I'm more than happy to say I will provide lots of that throughout this post with screenshots. There are LOTS of imgur links to back what I say so it's not just words on a post expecting you to just believe what I'm typing.
This post I suppose is "Part 2" my post back in April, "After 2 years of Daytrading. 7 months full time. Here's my advice". I'm doing this to update everyone who came/comes across this in the future. Yes, it is possible. No, it won't be easy. You will pay homage to the rite of passage into this career. I'll also provide some examples of styles of trading so for the newer aspiring traders, there will be some things I rarely see discussed on forums. So here's to 1 year of Full Time Day Trading

TL;DR - You'll become desensitized to trading. Stubborn to other strategies (There are biggebaddemore lucrative strategies. Don't chase them. Why fix what's not broken? I know what works for me and I'm content with it. No strategy is better than another. It's a personal choice. ). Losing individual trades won't faze you, they're inevitable. Profiting certainly feels better. After a while, you won't be as enthralled to trade every morning, it'll become just another part of your day). Trading is just managing your money through a statistic and the medium to execute it is trading on your platform. Think: "If. Then. Because". Your trading plan should be that black and white. Ask "Why" for everything you do and use. If you can't answer it with documented results, drop it.

I get a bunch of messages all the time from people asking - . Out of those who follow me and chat me seeking further tips through my previous posts. I'll be answering the FAQ's and addressing things I see frequently in this sub as far as trading axioms
Disclaimer: I won't sugarcoat anything. I'll share my experiences and add pieces of advice I'd give to those who are currently experiencing the same thing becoming a full time day trader and what day to day life is like, the occasional distress, (DRAWDOWNS). Some of you follow my Twitter for the past few months where I post my daily watchlists with a snippet that reveals my DayTradingBuyingPower. I do this not to brag but to demonstrate that the account does yield growth, I pay myself, and there are days where the balance does not move because there was no edge. I also do this since nobody else shows their account performance. (Yes. You, Mr. YouTube gurus and wannabe gurus).
We do this for income, the numbers on our accounts are real. Treat it as such. Get your initial capital out of your account THEN try to "Scale your account" with your profits AKA The Market's Money.

I'll go over:
•FAQ's that I get in my inbox (I'm still welcome to further questions if I don't answer here)
•Decision Fatigue (You will experience this)
•The previous year (2019-2020) of ups and downs
•How to use my watchlists that I post on Twitter in the morning to your advantage
•The pivotal moment that changed my trading career (NFLX 10-17-19)
•The road to becoming a full time trader. (It won't be fun unless you're handed the money)
•You'll have a better grasp of my strategy (Between ProTip 4 and 5. ProTip 8.)

There are 10 "ProTips" throughout the post that I wish I could tell myself years back and I'll periodically throw them in here as the post goes on. I make posts long in order to segregate those serious about this business and those who will just become another statistic in the failure rate of this business.

At the end of this post, I'll go over the frequent questions I receive such as: (Answers to FAQ at bottom of post.)
  1. "How do you prepare for a trading day?"
  2. "What would you go back to tell yourself?"
  3. "Books?" (The most abused question, but I get it. I could start a public library with just trading books I bought over the years)
  4. "What is your background?"
  5. "What is a normal day for you?"
  6. "How did you discover your strategy?"
  7. "What did you do/How did you get started?"
  8. "What is your % return?" (Not a fun question since a trading account is not an index or investment account. Intraday traders do not measure performance in %. Most are measured in "R".)
  9. "Is enough to start trading?"
  10. "Why do you need so many monitors"? (This one is rarely asked but I do see it discussed on platforms and people trading on mobile phones love giving flack to anybody who trades on multiple monitors. Hint: Everyone's different. Whatever works for the individual. There are no rules in trading. The only rule is that it works.)

My story:

I heard about daytrading during the 2008 crash while in high school. We all want to make more while working less. I entertained day trading from time to time but always realized I never had enough money. Horrible mindset because I could have still researched WHILE saving money to put into my trading business.
2015 - I opened my first trading account with Scottrade while in the Marines. Apparently if you have a net worth of over $1,000,000 you can get out early (Biggest rumor ever).
I frivolously bought crap penny stocks. In short - I was a hair away from gambling. What made it NOT gambling was the fact that at least I owned something tangible (Securities of a company) and anything can happen. Buy low sell high was my strategy. Didn't work obviously. No idea what I was doing. I'd buy and hold hoping to wake up to the stock price being way higher and it never happened.

ProTip #1 : If you hold a trade overnight... It is not daytrading. Stop turning into an investor because you can't admit a minor defeat.

2017 - I started taking this business seriously while working in the oilfield as a Logistics Planner (If you're wondering what company since I am asked this from time to time, Google: "World's largest oilfield services company").
No kids, girlfriend/wife or financial obligations. I worked 10AM - 7PM CST and would trade the open from home for roughly 1 hour. Later I was offered to be a Data Analyst... Only downside was... I couldn't trade since I had to be at work now at 8AM CST during the market open. In the moment of signing the offer letter, I was bummed thinking, "No more trading,"
That wasn't the case though. You can still build your trading business with a 9-5 and while never making one trade. The data is there.

ProTip #2 : We all see the same data. It's there forever. Many strategies show their edge both live and in hindsight the same. (Especially if you trade patterns). You CAN build your business as a trader without even taking a trade. You CAN build your strategy while working a 9-5. Just because you're not trading, does not mean you can't build your business through research. You won't know how you'll react to the losses but at least you can diagnose the raw data with a large enough sample size for assurance and confidence.

If you have a 9-5 and want to go fulltime into this business. Stay for a bit, save, live so far beneath your means that it is almost miserable, (depending on your expenses, area you live, family etc) and get a few hundred sample sizes of your strategy! And for your PTO/days off... trade the open. I sacrificed my vacation days to trade.
After 2 years in corporate America, eating cheap food, never going out, saving relentlessly, I made the decision to just do it and resigned. I went straight into the ring of fire known as trading. That was on: September 23rd, 2019
"" (Sound familiar?)

When you hear these types of comments.. your response should be: "Nobody put the time I put into this. The 90%+ who fail, don't have it all written out, computerized backtests, manual backtests, statistics, SOP manuals, JUST like the job I have which is a business, I'm just another cog in their wheel. I'll just be wearing all the hats in my trading business. Instead of Oil&Gas, it's just for trading". One thing I see here a lot is people saying to trade X amount of months/years or make X.

ProTip #3 - Think in man hours, not calendar. Example:
Trader A puts in 1 hour of study/work/research everyday for 1 year. (365 Hours)
Trader B puts in 12 hours of work every day for 4 months. (~1,450 Hours)
Trader A lives in a major city while Trader B lives in the middle of nowhere. (Think cost of living)
2 totally different living expenses and 2 different calibers of dedication. I'd put my money on Trader B because he put in more man hours. (~1,000 more hours on the clock to be more exact).

ProTip #4 - Have a cushion in your account AND your personal bank account. Having a strategy is great but you won't know entirely if you can fulfill and execute your plan until you experience the ups and downs both short and long term. A strategy is constant over long periods of time... there will be days, weeks, and perhaps a month here and there where you aren't making much money. We hear all the time, "Trade like a casino". Casinos don't make money day after day but the odds are in there favor over the long haul.

Month 1 of full time trading was great:
Immediately after going full time, the first month (September 2019 to October 2019), I did super well. Business as usual. No stress. Everything going as planned. No turbulence. At least not like I had ever experienced...

The 2 prerequisites I had before resigning was:
  1. Show consistency in returns. Consistent Sharpe Ratio.
  2. Make a 4 figure trade (I achieved this while short 100 shares on ROKU September 20th, 2019 and even made a victory post if you scroll down my profile's posts.)

First life-changing trading lesson learned as a full time trader:
That money printing spree ended on NFLX October 17th, 2019. Less than 1 month of being a full time trader. Deviating and going against my plan I actually made $500 in a matter of 4 minutes. If you follow my watchlists on Twitter, I always trade with the direction of the gap. If I notate, "Long Watches" that means I will only trade it IF (and only IF) I see a long biased pattern. Likewise I will only be looking to short my "Short Watches". Plenty of times I'll call out a ticker and it immediately goes the other way. No harm no foul because there was no long biased pattern to confirm my thesis.
On 10-17-2019, I went against my plan and it worked.. NFLX gapped up to resistance and I went short when it tanked off of a short pattern.(This is known as fading). The market gave me a free lunch and then some. So now I'm walking on air in my mind:
"I'm an absolute unit"
"I'll do it again and clear another $500 to make it a 4 figure day before 9:30AM Central"
"Should have quit my job way earlier being this good."
Within 30 minutes of the open. I gave all $500 back. Yes I wanted to trade it back. Never have I had the desire to smash anything but I do understand those who do! Yes I stood there and felt like each passing second was wasted opportunity. The next 24 hours were long!

ProTip #5: It's circumstances like that that help you in the long run. FunFact: I never once deviated from my plan since. Not ever again.

"I could have paid for my groceries and electric for the month after 4 minutes of trading if I just took the free pass the market gave me" I felt dumb but in hindsight, I'm glad at what happened. It was this exact instance that married me to my strategy/business plan. The next day and the 7 trading days following. I didn't make 1 profiting trade. My longest ever drawdown - 11 straight trades. While researching I found out this was Decision Fatigue (I'll go over this shortly below)

Put yourself in that situation...
You have bills and your income is strictly trading. I don't care how much a robot you think you are or how strongly you believe in probabilities, when you were in an office less than a month ago making almost 6 figures sitting in an air conditioned office knowing direct deposit is on its way every other Friday no matter how well or poorly you performed at work.. Now you're in the hot seat. Its a bottomless feeling. Now all of your friends and families words are ringing in your head.
But just like a boxing match.. you gotta take a hit to get a hit. Win some, lose some, shake hands and get back to normal life. Water under the bridge.
Mind you:
•No guaranteed direct deposit every 2 weeks.
•No more medical/dental insurance.
•401K retirement is no longer being matched.

11 trades is nothing. You only require ~5.5 trades at 2:1RRR to make it back OR 3.5 trades at 3:1RRR. It's nothing especially in your research because you can easily just scroll a little more and see, "Oh that's just a drawdown. No big deal". How will you react in real time? Will you buckle or choke? But the thing is, I was skipping trades out of fear and JUST so happened to be picking all of the unsuccessful ones. (Decision Fatigue)
Think about those 2 weeks of being in a drawdown. Half of the month. You're not just stagnant, your account is bleeding slowly but surely. Next time you're looking at your spreadsheet/backtest/predictive model/research.. try to put yourself in those days of drawdown. It's not just 11 boxes of red with "-1R" or "Loss" in them. The screenshot above on Imgur is just a recent example.
Think about your daily routine, going to the gym, hanging with friends, grocery shopping, cooking, going to bed, waking up, doing a routine, then losing again.. and again.. and again. Try to think of life during those 300+ hours (Weekends too) of, "I haven't made money. I've lost money. And I still have bills. After paying them, I'll be closer to my set Risk of Ruin".
Here's a lesson you won't learn before going fulltime but I'll do my best to emphasize it here:
Pick a strategy. And stick with it. It can literally be anything. Don't spread yourself thin watching 20+ tickers and be a jack of all patterns/tickers. Be a master of 1 pattern and master of 1 circumstance. There's this real thing called "Decision Fatigue" which explains exactly why what happened.. happened. The article explains that the 2 outcomes of this mental strain known as "Decision Fatigue" is:
  1. Risky Decision-Making
  2. Decision Avoidance
Sound familiar? Does it kind of make sense now? As a new trader you have YouTube, Facebook, StockTwits, Twitter, "gurus", books recommended on Amazon, all throwing their ideas/strategies around, the market has opportunities littered all over.. Decision Fatigue is inevitable for the unprepared. Decision Fatigue happens in every profession. If you mess up at your 9-5, its just a blunder, your paycheck will remain the same. Just a slap on the wrist and move on. With trading, you make a mistake.. it's less food on your table, lights don't stay on, and/or water isn't running. That pressure adds up. No wonder so many fail...
The signs of Decision Fatigue:
When you find what clicks with you AND its either statistically or performance proven, have the courage to risk a healthy sum of your capital into it. There are strategies/patterns/styles of trading littered all over the internet:
Very broad example:
"IF circumstance happens THEN "Execution". Stoploss is XYZ. Target is XYZ. BECAUSE over a series of Y trades, I will make $X,XXX.xx".

ProTip #6 : Strategies are all over the internet. It's your account/money, backtest it. People share their strategies here all the time and although I don't agree with them because I know what works for me, it's something to chew off of for you newer traders. YouTube is a harbor with people who give just enough info to figure their style out. You will lose trades. Sit for some screen-time and pay homage to the edge that you discover. All in due time.

Insert key metrics and find correlations. This is how you create checks and balances to create/formulate a black and white trading plan. When I first started doing this, my spreadsheet(s) had so many columns it was annoying and would kill my desire to continue working. You'll find things that are imperative and some that are unimportant. For a lack of more colorful terms: "Throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks" Trim the fat. Rinse and repeat.

Here's some things I used to remind myself of and perhaps it'll ring some bells for you:

Surrender your capital to your edge. If you truly accept the risk and trust your proven edge, losses don't feel like anything nor do profits. Although we're not here to put on losing trades and yes it does feel nice to profit. I still from time to time will excited when I hit target after a series of multiple profiting trades depending on my mood.
If you're nervous or your heart starts beating quicker when you hear the sound effect of a trade getting entered/filled. Be honest with yourself and ask yourself if you're truly accepting the risk.
Things you can't take to the bank:
  1. RRR.
  2. Win-Rate
  3. Number of trades.
  4. "This one great trade that I hit target in less than 30 seconds and I got filled better than expected"
All of these are integral metrics. But you're trading to make money. It's up or down, green or red, profit or loss, TRUE or FALSE. So with that said, find what works flawlessly and is easy to follow. Checks and Balances. Then allocate a good sum of risk into it. I read it here all the time, "Don't risk too much" and that's great and true for new traders. But don't sell yourself short. Push yourself over the edge and admit that you know your stuff. Think of Trader A and Trader B. If you've put the time in.. don't sell yourself short. You've built enough courage to learn a business so many fail at. This business has such a negative connotation. But remember that not everybody can handle meritocracies and that's exactly what the market is. Don't try to be the best, just work harder than everyone else and the output of your input will be relative.

ProTip #7: YouTube trading ads from gurus... they're subconsciously making you think you're a novice trader. It's in their marketing. They study marketing psychology. The EASIEST things to sell:
  1. Health
  2. Wealth
  3. Happiness
People that are desperate for those things are the most vulnerable and these "Traders" marketers are fantastic at portraying all 3 of those things at once.

ProTip #8 (Broken record alert) : Write a business plan. Your strategy shouldn't take longer than 4 sentences to explain to another trader. When you have a plan that's proven through a statistic and WAIT for it to happen, you feel 100X better taking the trade. You don't even care too much when it results in a loss. Because that was your plan, you accept it much better, and you know it was just an expense for a winning trade.

Want my strategy? "I scan for stocks with a market cap of over 250M, 10k shares premarket, gapping to support or resistance, priced over $10, and I look for a pattern biased to the direction of the overnight gap. It isn't rocket science. Check my Twitter, look at the dates I posted, and you'll notice the gist. Yes this is an edge but not the entire edge. How fast can you sift through 15 time frames? How long does it take you to fill out your order ticket? Your Fibonacci time extensions with 5 EMA's and Bollinger Bands aren't helping you. They're lagging. If they work for you, great. In my experience, they hindered my visibility.

Pro Tip #9: Yes statistics are highly applicable to trading. Patterns do work. All patterns do is tell you WHEN to enteexit, and how many shares. Humans will never think differently of money. Be the frontrunner of the market's emotions. Nobody remembers the indecisive leader. Risk taking is a commonality amongst leaders. Trading requires courage and it's O.K. to show a bit of confidence as long as you also have the humility to admit when you're in a bad trade. (Notice how I didn't put, "wrong". You're only "wrong" when you deviate from a proven strategy.)

ProTip #10: Risk management is 24/7. I've never heard anyone mention this but think about it a little bit. Having financial obligations can become stressful regardless of how you earn your income but its far more stressful while running a business. Not just any business, but a business where you can go to work on your A-game, do every single last thing right, trade without emotion etc... and still walk away with less money than what you came to work with. Meanwhile somebody who JUST started trading made a 4 figure profit not knowing what the heck the difference between ETB, HTB, or NTB. Think of it like this, a JV high school baseball player can hit a homerun off of an MLB pitcher once.. but how will he fare at the end of the season? Traders don't predict stock prices, traders predict the outcome over hundreds of trades. People chat me asking what TO do rather than what NOT to do. You don't learn labor intensive jobs or how to fly a plane by what to do.. you learn what NOT to do to stay alive.

That's all I have. Once you have a trading plan underway and you're executing it, you don't have much time when your hobbies are cheap but I still do respond to chats/messages. I do get asked from a previous post when I'll build a website and to answer that: I'm learning how to build a site on rainy days. Can't put a definitive date on it. I will say that its coming, if you don't give up on this business in the next year or so, you'll see it. What I plan on putting on there:
  1. RiskReward Calculators
  2. Position size Calculators
  3. EV Calculator
  4. Dictionary with examples
I just don't want some generic WordPress site. I want my website to be stellar and a great resource for aspiring traders. Something I didn't have learning this business. I want it to be something I'd consider a staple in a trader's resources. Perhaps one day it will be referenced on this sub frequently.
  1. "How do you prepare for a trading day?" I get behind the computer about 20 minutes before the bell. Reason being: "If you study long. You'll study wrong". If the chart isn't grabbing my attention and gets me excited, then I flick to the next ticker. I don't even know the companies I trade half the time nor do I care about a news report some journalist wrote. Also there is no magic news outlet that lets you know about "Major events that affect stock prices". If there was, I wouldn't be here because we're all subscribed to the same edge nor would I be trading my style.
  2. "What would you go back to tell yourself?" Get more data. Save a little more, your hairline and sleep schedule will thank you. Take only perfect trades and don't feel forced to trade. There will be days you don't touch an order ticket. And days where you are busy and have tunnel vision. Next thing you know its time to shut it down for the day.
  3. "Books?" - I try to humble myself when answering this but off the cuff, they're all mediocre. Andrew Aziz's was ok, definitely get it, it's only a few bucks on Kindle. Just don't expect it to give you strategies BUT it will give you ideas. If you're brand new, it is good as it will teach you the common vernacular of a day trader. Mark Douglas was interesting but his YouTube seminar recordings are much better. No book, Facebook group, YouTube channel is going to be the end all be all perfect strategy. Expect losses. Don't be a one hitter quitter after suffering a few tiny losses/paper cuts. Stick to it. Most books will help you familiarize yourself with the common vocabulary amongst traders and will hint ideas. It's your job to formulate the strategy and template for research.
  4. "What is your background?" I was a logistics planner for a major oilfield services company. Later I then became a data/buyer analyst so yes, data analytics/research was a 2nd language for me entering trading. I did have that upper hand and did shave off months if not years for me.
  5. "What is a normal day for you?" I'm always done trading after 10:30AM Central. I will hold onto a trade until right before the bell if it hasn't hit either target or StopLoss by the time I leave the house but it is absolutely closed in entirety by 2:55PM Central. After I trade, I enjoy the day. No I'm not riding around in my Lambos posting IG/Snapchat (I have neither) stories of my profits with my private jet waiting on a runway trying to sell an $7 eBook or a $100 membership (HINT HINT). I grill/cook, read, workout, ride my motorcycle, attack my other sources of income (small businesses I'm building), hit the driving range, shoot guns, etc. I live in Texas. Life is cheap and fun here.
  6. "How did you discover your strategy?" I bought TradeIdeas premium, went through all of their computerized backtesting patterns, tested them. Then did what I mentioned earlier... Tried to find correlations in metrics. It distilled the trades to a strict criteria and here I am. I post on average 4-5 tickers on my watchlist. 7 max. I do not like spreading my attention thin across multiple tickers. I do not recommend buying TradeIdeas, it does have lots of bugs.
  7. "What did you do/How did you get started?" Was a data analyst, was good at research and applied it to trading. My incentive was, "I could have made more money trading rather than sitting in 2+ hours of roundtrip traffic and 9 hours in an office. The data is there. Everybody sees the same charts all over the world. There are ways to make this possible"
  8. "What is your % return?" (Not a fun question since a trading account is not an index or investment account. Intraday traders do not measure performance in %) I trade to make money AND pay myself, so my equity curve will look like a small loss or small gain after I pay myself. % return? I measure my account's performance in Sharpe Ratio and Risk Units. My Sharpe Ratio is ~1.85. While I yield roughly .8 - 1 R per trading day. Some weeks I make 10R. Some weeks I lose 2R. Yeah one week I might make $2,500. But the next week I might lose $300. The following week my strategy will yield $0 and the last week I might make $1,000. Some weeks suck. Some weeks are great. But overall. Just shy of 1R per trading day. Some days I'm super busy taking trade after trade. Some days I'll shut it down after 5 minutes without even filling out an order ticket. Some days I won't even see the open because there is no edge for me.. Keywords... "For me".
  9. "Is enough to start trading?" Depends on where you live. Are you restricted to PDT? If not then how much are you obligated to expenses? I live in Texas. Things are cheap here. If you live in NYC or The Bay Area your expenses will be astronomical compared to mine. A $30,000 account is totally doable for a single Texan with low monthly expenses. Now if you're in California or New York? I'm sure you'll fall below 25k if you have 1 bad month. Also depends on if you have other sources of income or a full/part time job. I encourage every trader and aspiring trader to have multiple sources of income, don't rely solely on trading. Not just for the sake of mitigating pressure but also for sanity. If you have a family to provide for, I don't know what that's like, you never know when Little Johnny is going to randomly pick up Trombone lessons for a school program/play while little Suzie needs transmission work in her car because a simple solenoid went out. $1,700 later.
  10. "Why do you need so many monitors?" I use 3 for trading. The 4th is for music. The other 2 are useless while trading. That's for trading though. When I made the decision to go full time, I knew I was about to go off the chain with research. And sifting between spreadsheets, a platform to see multiple timeframes for a pattern to backtest. My attention span is short, I'll lose my train of thought before I open the other tab to input data. But the main reason was for research. It's such a time saver and is a headache repellant when doing research while everything is laid out in front of you. Now that I have a system. I'll most likely be treating myself to 2 ultrawides for Christmas.
As always, thank you to everybody who takes time out to message me and letting me know some people read these and show appreciation. I would say, "Good luck" but there is no luck in trading. Just statistics. Remember that!
In conclusion: Yes. Full time trading is possible, depending where you live/monthly expenses and obligations. You're more likely to become a profitable trader than a professional athlete. There is a level of uncertainty each day, perhaps each week, doubtful each month, and definitely not each year. If I ever want a raise, I just consult my business plan and financials, then decide if I can handle it mentally. If you have medical issues, get a part time job for the benefits. If you're healthy, just be careful.

All the best!
submitted by CJT2013 to Daytrading [link] [comments]

2020.10.01 02:05 GunnarKaasen So What Am I Supposed to Do with This?

I've been visiting a LOT of sites today as I prepare for a tax filing.
So it was not surprising that I received a security-check email this afternoon.
While I appreciate their intent to protect me - whoever they are - I cannot for the life of me determine how to verify that theirs was one of the sites I visited today, or if not, which site I should change my password on. The entire text of their email follows:
Tax Package Support <[email protected]
Your email (aaa @ xxx.yy) was used to sign in to Tax Package Support via a web browser.
Date and Time: Wednesday, September 30, 2020 3:15:23 PM CST
BrowseOperating System: Chrome.85Windows.10 If the information above looks familiar, you can ignore this message.
If you did not request this new device authorization, we recommend changing your password as soon as possible.
I looked at the full headers, and whoever the original sender was is hidden behind the commercial email service that they use for their customer-relationship messages.
So what good was their message to begin with, and what should I do with it/because of the message?
submitted by GunnarKaasen to cybersecurity [link] [comments]

2020.09.25 19:45 trifletruffles Mattie Greene-killed in a bomb explosion in Ringgold, Georgia on May 19, 1960-Closed Case under the Civil Rights Division Emmett Till Act

Mattie Greene was the mother of six children when she was killed in a dynamite explosion that destroyed her home in Ringgold, Georgia on May 19, 1960. She was 32 years old at the time. Mattie's husband, Jethro, and 13 year old Jethro Jr., 6 year old David, 4 year old William, along with 17 month old Larry were also at home during the explosion and suffered minor injuries. Mattie's remaining two children were not home at the time as they were staying at their grandmother's. Authorities initially suspected Jethro of planting the bomb since he only suffered a bruised shoulder and investigations revealed that Mattie was involved in an extramarital affair which provided a motive. However, he was eventually cleared. Governor Ernest Vandiver offered a $500 reward for any information and despite the involvement of the FBI, no one was ever arrested for Mattie's murder.
Jethro served in the U.S. Army during World War II as a construction foreman. After the war ended, he worked as an auto mechanic and married Mattie who worked as a housekeeper. After clearing Jethro, authorities suspected that he and his family might have been targeted due to his possible involvement with the NAACP. However, it is unclear if he was a NAACP member since NAACP records regarding Ringgold and Catoosa County were not kept. A local sheriff, J.D. Stewart, suspected that many men were meeting at a local home under the pretense of being part of a singing group but these men were actually holding NAACP meetings. Jethro was noted to have been part of a singing group and was often featured on local Chattanooga radio thus lending some credence to Sheriff Stewart's suspicions. Nevertheless, the extent of Jethro's advocacy remains unclear and his 1994 obituary only lists an affiliation with the A. Randolph Institute which advocated for labor rights.
2009 FBI Investigation:
In April 2009, as part of efforts to solve civil rights-era homicide cases, the FBI in conjunction with the Department of Justice started an investigation of Mattie's murder under the Emmett Till Civil Rights Act. The FBI tried to review initial investigation files but they were all either destroyed in a flood during the 1970s or general document retention procedures. Thus, most of the information from the investigation comes from a redacted copy of the initial FBI file provided to the Southern Poverty Law Center. Since the files were lost or destroyed, the FBI began its current investigation by interviewing various relatives and children of Mattie. They also interviewed members of the community who were familiar with Lester Waters and W.E. Watters as they were rumored to have been involved in the explosion.
Mattie's [relationship and name redacted] was interviewed by the FBI. She stated that, at the time, she was told by Sheriff Stewart that Lester had confessed to the crime and that guilt had driven him crazy. Sheriff Stewart also told her that he transported Lester to a mental institution in Milledgeville, Georgia. Another of Mattie's [relationship and name redacted] similarly stated she was approached by a white woman years ago who said Lester was involved and it drove him crazy to the point where he had to be taken to a Milledgeville institution.
Based on these two recollections, the FBI conducted interviews with W.E. and Lester's family. Lester, W.E. and Sheriff Stewart are now deceased. Lester's [relationship and name redacted] stated that another possible suspect, [name redacted], was active in the Ku Klux Klan and that [name redacted] was good friends with Sheriff Stewart and Lester; they would often hold meetings at Lester's house which centered around a hatred of blacks and Jews. Accordingly, the FBI interviewed [name redacted] who denied they had anything to do with Mattie's murder. It was noted that [name redacted] worked for U.S. Pipe and Foundry on an I-75 construction project at the time. [Name redacted]'s place of employment is interesting because the original FBI file noted that the I-75 construction project involved demolition, namely the use of ammonium nitrate and electric dynamite caps. The initial investigation file noted that a piece of red and orange wire was found near Mattie's home; this wire was the type used in manufacturing electric dynamite caps. The 1960 investigation file is unclear regarding whether the FBI pursued this lead any further beyond calling the superintendent of U.S. Pipe and Foundry.
After interviewing [name redacted], the FBI tried to find out more about the type of work [name redacted] would have been involved in. Original employment records were destroyed but the FBI was able to get in touch with an operations manager who noted that in 1960, no dynamite would have been present at the work site due to the type of work being done. The FBI asked [name redacted] to take a polygraph test which they passed. As the FBI was not able to develop any new leads, the Department of Justice closed the case. Mattie's murder remains unsolved.
The closing memorandum discussed Jethro as a suspect after investigations showed that Mattie was involved in an extramarital affair. While an individual was identified, it is unclear if this individual was questioned. For some reason, Jethro's name was redacted in the memorandum when it discussed his injuries as noted by the statement "it seemed almost impossible, after viewing the scene, that XXX suffered as little injury as XXX" but based on the context, I was able to surmise the memorandum was discussing Jethro.
I came across the Department of Justice’s cold case initiative (Emmett Till Civil Rights Act) while reading an article discussing journalists’ efforts to install a billboard on an Arkansas highway aimed at solving the 1954 lynching of Isadore Banks. The Civil Rights Division of the United States Department of Justice launched a website (linked above) to make information about the department’s investigation of cold cases from the Civil Rights Era more accessible to the public. As a result of the initiative, the Department of Justice has prosecuted and convicted Edgar Ray Killen for the 1964 murders of three civil rights workers in Philadelphia, Mississippi (the "Mississippi Burning" case); he is the eight defendant convicted. The Department has also been able to charge and convict perpetrators of the 1963 Sixteenth Street Baptist Church bombing in Birmingham, Alabama and secured a life sentence for James Ford Seale for the kidnapping and murder of two teenagers in Franklin County, Mississippi in 1964.
Unfortunately, many cases which were submitted to the Department of Justice remain unsolved due to the passage of time resulting in evidentiary and legal barriers. In each case that is not prosecutable, the Department of Justice wrote a closing memorandum explaining the investigative steps taken and the basis for their conclusion. To date, the Department of Justice has uploaded 115 closing memos. I hope to be able to post on all of the closed cases as I share in the belief with the Department of Justice that “these stories should be told [as] there is value in a public reckoning with the history of racial violence and the complicity of government officials.”
Other posts from the Department of Justice's Cold Case Initiative:
  1. Isadore Banks-unsolved murder in Marion, Arkansas-June 1954
  1. Willie Joe Sanford-unsolved murder in Hawkinsville, Georgia-March 1957
  1. Ann Thomas-unsolved murder in San Antonio, Texas-April 1969
  1. Thad Christian-murdered on August 30, 1965 in Central City, Alabama
  1. Silas Caston-killed on March 1, 1964 by a Hinds County Sheriff’s Office Deputy in Jackson, Mississippi
  1. Clifford "Clifton" Walker-unsolved murder in Woodville, Mississippi-February 1964
  1. Jasper Greenwood- his badly decomposed body was found in Vicksburg, Mississippi in June 1964
submitted by trifletruffles to UnresolvedMysteries [link] [comments]

2020.09.23 22:59 TinkerLytics Little help identifying where script could be at.

Site tagged with 2 GA tags. I gained access to GA. I can't identify where the second tag is at. They implement the GOOD TAG via GTM - valid code (not bold).
However, the second code is not valid (bold). Their site is built on weebly. I cannot find this other script in the back end. Could this be via GTM?

Thanks for your help.
submitted by TinkerLytics to GoogleTagManager [link] [comments]

2020.09.23 14:52 Mister_Incrediblexx still no refund! (but have refund amount) HELP!

Ok I'm confused. I checked the "Where's my refund" on the IRS site" it has the refund amount, BUT it also has a balance due amount. Will they automatically take the balance out of the expected refund amount? do I have to pay that due amount for them to release my money?

"We made changes to your tax return that changed the amount of your refund.
Our changes eliminated your expected refund and resulted in a balance due of $179.52. You will receive a notice that explains the changes to your tax return. Your notice was mailed on August 31, 2020. "
Identification Number:
Filing Status:
Tax Period Ending:
December 31, 2019
Your Expected Refund Amount:
Balance Due:
You Will Receive a Notice Dated:
August 31, 2020
submitted by Mister_Incrediblexx to IRS [link] [comments]

2020.09.22 16:17 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
I'm available for:
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
submitted by bhoway to freelance_forhire [link] [comments]

2020.09.22 16:17 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
I'm available for:
See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
submitted by bhoway to jobbit [link] [comments]

2020.09.22 16:17 bhoway [For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥

[For Hire] Professional UX/UI Designer Available for Hire for Web & Mobile Apps 👋 — Get Your App/Website Designed 🔥
Hey there!
My name is Brendan, and I'm a freelance/remote UX/UI & product designer. I've just wrapped up some projects and I'm currently available for more work.
Quick details:
  • I graduated (with Honours) from the 4-year Bachelor of Interaction Design program at Sheridan College (Canada), where I honed skills in user-centered and accessible design practices.
  • I have over 7+ years of experience designing and developing sites and UX/UI for small business owners and startups. Websites, web applications, and mobile apps. From SaaS startups to B2C applications to small business websites - I've been blessed to have worked with many wonderful entrepreneurs and clients over the past years.
  • Previous in-house working experience at Drop ($65M+ raised to date) and Christie Digital.
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I'm available for:
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  • General UX/UI & Web Design - Using Figma, Sketch, or Adobe XD.
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See my work:
My pricing is fixed per project, and starts in the mid $x,xxx. It depends on the project.
Contact me:
  • I'd be happy to hear about your project. Let's talk! Please contact me through my website. :)
submitted by bhoway to DesignJobs [link] [comments]